My Semester With the Host Mom From Hell

Countless classmates gush about lifelong bonds forged with their study-abroad host families. I certainly had an unforgettable experience sharing a small Spanish home with a stingy señora, eating her ketchup-covered pizza and dodging Maribel’s ridiculou

Illustrations by Stephanie Hofmann

Megan and I had been staying with Maribel for less than a week when we found the journal. It was on the shelf above our beds, a warning from a past lodger about how to survive a semester with our host.

“Maribel gets cranky if you don’t finish your plate.”

“Maribel uses a lot of olive oil. This is normal in Spain, but don’t let her see you wiping it off, and don’t mention it.”

“Don’t shower too early in the morning or too late at night — Maribel will restrict your hot water use.”

“Don’t let the door shut loudly if you come home late at night, Maribel is a light sleeper.”

“You have to ask Maribel to do laundry, she won’t always remember to do the sheets.”

At first we thought nothing of it. Maribel was just a character, a true Spanishseñora. Kooky, perhaps, but not sinister. I figured any road bumps in my host situation would just lend authenticity to my experience — what host isn’t without their quirks and idiosyncrasies? This was someone else’s home after al…