The Phallus Palace

From X-rated artwork to enormously endowed statuettes, one addictive collector transforms his Upper West Side apartment into a shrine to male anatomy.

Photos by Kyria Abrahams

“It’s my morning ritual,” says the collector. “I get a cup of coffee and open up eBay and Etsy. I’ve bought two or three penises before most people's alarm clocks have gone off.”

The collector, who wishes not to reveal his name, lives in an $850-a-month rent-stabilized apartment on the Upper West Side—the same place he’s resided since 1977. The spacious, railroad-style abode has seen its fair share of collections come and go over the past twenty-four years. First, he collected various versions of the five of spades, from playing card decks. Then, it was misters—anything to do with the word “mister,” be it Coffee, Clean or T. There was also the series of devils and a collection of Nancy comic strip paraphernalia—that androgynous, hollow-eyed, Brillo-haired girl made famous by Ernie Bushmiller. But in the end, one collection stood high above the rest: penises.

There are well over a thousand pieces of penis-related art in his home, and yes, the collection is growing…